Hi 👋, Can I Request A Self Aware Smilk & Reader, Where He’s The Only One Who Knows Of Their Existence,

Hi 👋, can I request a self aware Smilk & reader, where he’s the only one who knows of their existence, and the reader can sometimes take control of him which causes some confusion to other cookies.

(You can choose whether it’s a one-shot or headcanons)

Yess self awareness time

.......

After trying and trying again, you finally pulled Shadow Milk Cookie from the gacha, thrilled that he finally came home!

Now that you've understood all the hype surrounding him and how crazy powerful he can be after clearing his Beast Yeast episodes, you had all your star jellies, toppings, and a legendary beascuit saved just for him.

But ever since obtaining him, you've noticed some...oddities with him that made you assume it was part of his programming/AI.

When you see him walking around the kingdom or working at a station that's not the toy store, he's looking at you a lot.

Of course, some cookies may glance at you occasionally, with even fewer breaking the fourth wall (like Black Sapphire and Devil Cookie), but that's just what the devs added as a funny joke.

Shadow Milk...is different. He doesn't follow their script to a T.

The way he talks and waves at you, shows off during battles and making himself the last cookie standing in difficult arena fights, and doing his juggling trick when he knows you're looking at him.

Then he actually responded to you after you made a remark about where to put his statue...and at first you're startled, bc no way could that have been a coincidence...

In reality, he had an "awakening" of his own--in that his knowledge suddenly extended beyond CRK's borders.

Somehow, he can see and hear you, becoming 100% aware that he's in a video game.

But you assume his new antics are part of his programming...until one day the charade falls apart and he straight up tells you that he knows the truth. He even says your username, the device you're playing on, and the day you started CRK as proof in case you think he's lying.

You're stunned at first, but then you think it's actually pretty awesome....until he claims that he's the only one who knows and felt like it would've been better if he didn't.

Of course, the master of deceit would rather ignore the truth and live out a lie, like all the other cookies are....but he's stuck with this earthbread-shattering truth that's only his to bear.

In a way, being "trapped" in this game reminds him of the witches and the time he spent in the silver tree, believing he escaped one prison only to end up in another.

After you leave the game to tend to some real life matters, he tries sowing chaos in the kingdom by revealing this to other cookies, thinking they'd "wake up".

Yet none of them know wtf he's talking about. Not even the Beasts or Pure Vanilla, who thinks he's just trying to trick everybody again..although he admits that what Shadow Milk is saying sounds most outlandish.

Typically, he'd be able to conjure up some kind of "evidence" and manipulate wide masses into believing any word he says.

But you're untouchable, and he has no way of obtaining tangible proof of your existence to show the other cookies...and once he realizes this, he gets frustrated.

"Who do you think fulfills our wishes at the tree???? Who do you think indulges us with star jellies????? Keeps this kingdom from crumbling to pieces?!! We are ALL the puppets to an even bigger puppet master!"

Anyone who hears this yap from him just thinks 'is he alright? like genuinely?'

The next time you log in, Shadow Milk is gravely upset that he has to carry this burden and decides to take it out on you.

Suddenly there's lag spikes when his ability is on cooldown (so you can hardly use them in battle and lose your ranking in arena), he avoids you trying to pick him up in the kingdom (much to other cookies' confusion, as from their pov, he's fleeing something that's invisible)...and he even corrupted his own stats to make it seem like any promotions were gone and his level dropped back to 1.

You ask him why he's causing you all this trouble, and his next rant was more or less....a reasonable crashout.

"I was a god...or at least that's what I thought. But no. I've been lied to. A master of deceit...has been lied to again!! What cruel irony! This world...this life of mine....it's all been one big game from the start! And nobody knows but I!! HAHAHA!! Tell me, [username]..what's it like being the true god of this world? Do you enjoy toying with our lives? What makes you think you deserve my power?! Damn you....and damn this prison!! YOU'RE NO BETTER THAN THOSE WITCHES!!!"

Other cookies just see him screaming at nobody in particular, although his rage forms rifts in the ground, from which the other-realm creeps out to attack anyone close to him.

You end up closing the game out of fear, leaving it alone for the next several hours.

While initially scared to reopen it, you did understand why Shadow Milk lashed out like that--he thought he was in control, and couldn't comprehend the idea of it being somebody else.

You don't know why he, of all cookies, had to be cursed with this forbidden knowledge, but what could be done about it now?

Nothing.

So you returned to the game and found a plushie of him somewhere after looking around for a few minutes, and after clicking him, he turns back to normal and scowls.

"What? You've come back to toy with me more, stupid god? Or were you just worried that I did something to your precious kingdom?"

"No, and no." You say, explaining to him that while you'd never fully understand what he was feeling--and couldn't help him explain your existence to other cookies--you wanted him to see you as a friend, not a puppet master or a witch or some untouchable god like he accuses you of being.

To show him you're serious, you bought all of his decor and gave him his own little castle/spire-like area, where he can indulge in his hobbies or just retreat there whenever he wanted to.

For some time, Shadow Milk is silent as he inspects everything and for a moment...you thought he reverted back to his NPC programming...

Then he looks at you and grins a little. "Jeez, if only you put this much effort into the rest of the kingdom."

"Yeah, well...I'm working on it." You chuckled. "Black Sapphire and Candy Apple Cookie think it's "dull" and doesn't compare to your spire, but-"

"I'll deal with them later. This...is acceptable."

It's fair to say...he's content.

He seems to finally accept his new reality, as he doesn't corrupt his stats or sabotage your gameplay anymore, allowing you to use him as your strongest magic cookie again.

Now if you start shifting your focus towards pulling Awakened Pure Vanilla, however, he might stir up some trouble to make the process take even longer

Letters

Ships: Prinxiety, Platonic Moxiety, platonic analogical, platonic dukexiety, brotherly anxceit

Warning: Cursing, Angst, Crying, Hearts Broken, Leaving people behind, Remus and Deceit are in this story! But they aren't the bad guys!

The other sides can't stop crying. They were all broken.

Virgil left. Their Virgil. His Virgil.

The emo left. Their emo left. His emo left.

Anxiety is gone. But how? When? Where? Why?

11 a.m.

Patton was still waiting. Logan insisted they eat early. Patton was confused, Virgil wasn't usually this late. Is he okay? What did Patton do? Did another fight happen? What happened? Did something go wrong? Did Patton do anything? Did Pa-

Patton was cut short with a hand rubbing his back. He couldn't tell who was in front of him, the tears in his eyes made it blurry. He could hear well though. "--tton. Tap once if you could hear me." The voice said, taking hold of Patton's hand.

Patton tapped and felt the hand. "Logan." He thought to himself as he felt the bracelet he gave him. "Okay. I need you to breathe Patton. In for 4, hold for 8, out for 7." Patton was having a hard time breathing but Logan tapping the beat on his hand helped.

Patton could breathe and see properly now. "Wh-what happened?" Patton asked, wiping away the tears. "You started hyperventilating. That's not usually normal with you." Logan remarked, giving Patton a few tissues.

Patton nodded and started fidgeting with his sweater. Roman came down and sensed the tension between the two. Roman nodded at Logan and sat at far end of the table. "Sooo, no Virgil yet?" Roman asked, tilting his head.

Patton sniffled and nodded. Logan sighed and put an arm around Patton and squeezed him a bit. "Everything will be okay. And Roman? Will it be okay if you check on Virgil? He is usually not this late." Logan said.

Roman nodded and made his way up to Virgil's room. He knocked the black door that was decorated with purple that said "Virge" in his handwriting. "Weird." Roman told himself. He knocked twice now.

Thrice.

Four times.

5 times.

He grew impatient and jiggled the door knob. He was threw the door open and was met with nothing but a dark room. He opened the lights and scanned the room. "Virgil?" He called out. Roman groaned and called out again. "Virge? this isn't funny. Patton isn't gonna be happy."

He stepped inside and checked his room for Virgil. Nothing seemed out of place. His guitar case was in it's usual spot. He checked Virgil's private rest room. No foggy mirror. The bed was messy. It was usually made.

"Virge? ....Virgil?" Roman called out, before checking the drawers. He found 3 envelopes(ah shit here we go-), one in dark blue with Logan's name, one in pastel blue with Patton's and one in res, with Roman's name. Roman's eyes widened. "Shit shit shit shit Virgil no please don't do this to us." Roman said, running out.

"Logan! Patton! Shit Virgil don't do this to us." Roman shouted, going down two steps at a time. "Did something wrong happen?" Patton asked. Roman panted and nodded as he gave out the letters.

"I don't understand, why did he write us letters? Is he showing us his love? Was he in the room?" Logan asked, inspecting the envelope. "Okay specs so he's not showing us his love and no, he was not in his room." Roman said, panting.

"Then..what's wrong?" Patton asked, concern in his voice. Roman raked a hand through his hair and began telling them.

"Hey, Roman? What's the best way to tell someone you're leaving them?" Virgil asked, breaking the silence. They were stargazing in their imagination. Roman faced Virgil and raised an eyebrow.

"You planning to leave us Emo Knightmare?" Roman asked, concerned. "Oh! No no no! I just had the question because uh, I'm wondering, is there any way we can tell someone that we're leaving without hurting them?" Virgil clarified, smiling awkwardly.

Roman nodded and looked back at the stars. "Well, you will hurt them really. It's hard to focus because you know you're going to hurt them. But, if I were to do if, which I won't, I would write a letter really. I don't want them to chase after me and all that." Roman said. Virgil nodded and faced back at stars.

"Hey Ro?"

"Yeah Virge?"

"Thanks for being a really nice friend, I'm sorry for calling you nicknames and all that." Virgil said, facing Roman.

Virgil chuckled and smiled softly. "Same goes to you V. Past is past, we're friends now." Roman said. Smiling.

But

He still never gets hurt.

He's broken and Virgil doesn't knows.

Patton felt tears going down his cheeks. Logan was shocked. Roman is...broken, really frustrated.

"No no no no no Virgil. No. No!" Patton said, letting his head down and letting his tears roll down his face. "..Roman? Did you know?" Logan asked, hugging Patton tighter. "No, I didn't I- I didn't mean- I just- I never wanted to give him id-ideas, Logan, P-patton, I'm so- I'm so sorry." Roman stuttered, panicking more and more.

Patton looked back up and opened his arms and let Roman fall into his touch. "I'm really- really so-sorry I- I'm very sorry, please fo-forgive me guys!" Roman said, starting to panic. "Ro, breathe, 4, 8, 7, continue that." Logan said, grabbing Roman's hand and tapping the beat on his hand.

Roman's breathing slowed down but he was still panicking. "I-i think we should read these. Privately, but f-first, we should, see if he's with the others." Patton suggested, rubbing Roman's back. Roman nodded and Logan gave a thumbs up.

"You two should rest, I'll go ask. For now, stay safe." Logan assured, closing his eyes and sinking out. He opened up his eyes as he heard a voice say "Logan!" He looked around. "Remus' room." He thought. "Logie! What are you doing here specs?" Remus exclaimed, placing his deodorant on the side.

"Ah Remus. I have a question. Have you seen Virgil? He isn't in our area and he left us notes and we thought he was wi-" Logan said, before being cut off by the door being swung open by Deceit. He looked at Remus, whose smile fell and Deceit, who was not wearing his usual outfit.

(How did Deceit open the door in time well- that's a story for another day-)

"Okay wait wait wait! You got the letters too? Logan, thank god." Deceit exclaimed, making his way towards both. "Wait..how did he give you the letters, may I ask?" Logan said, gesturing to a dark green envelope on the side. "I-i'm not sure. I woke up and found these next to me." Remus said.

Logan nodded and paced the room. "Have you read them yet?" Logan asked, ignoring the feeling of panic growing in his chest. Remus shook his head and Deceit sat down beside Remus, putting an arm around him.

"Ah, I suggest you read them privately. But if uh, your feelings, get in the way. Ask for help." Logan said, looking back at Remus and Deceit. Remus was crying now and Deceit's eyes were teary eyed.

"I- I just- I really miss him Logan. I kn- I know that it doesn't se-seem like that. He- he would be the- there for me and D-dee. We-we would play and lau-laugh.. He- he was our be- ..." Remus choked out, tears falling more and more. "He was our best friend." Deceit said, finishing the sentence for Remus.

Logan sighed softly and nodded. "I-i know..he was like a brother to me. He was a nice friend. I'll leave you guys for now. Farewell." Logan said, smiling softly and sinking out. He was able to catch Deceit's thank you before sinking out.

Logan rose up and looked down to see a note on the kitchen table.

"Hey Logie! Roman and I are in our rooms. We decided to take a break before reading our letters! We'll start reading them at around 1 p.m.! I think you should do the same! Bye!

~ Patton & Ro"

Logan smiled and took his letter out from his pocket. He made his way up the stairs. He entered his room and tossed the letter on his desk. He plopped himself on his chair and looked at the clock.

"12:59"

Logan waited until it hit 1 and took the letter. Roman was on the floor, taking out the letter from it's envelope. Patton was lying down on his bed, doing the same thing. Deceit was in the other side's kitchen. Remus was in his room.

(From here, this is gonna be what it says in their letters! Enjoy <3)

Dear Logan,

Hey L. I'm really sorry for doing this to you. To Dad. To Ro. I'm very sorry. You may not see me telling you I'm sorry or anything, but I am. You're like a brother to me. You're smart, funny, savage. You're just cool. You're talking confuses me sometimes but that doesn't matter.

You say you don't have "feelings" but deep down, you do. Do me a favor and try and find them. You're more than what you think Lo. You're doing well Lo. You're amazing. You're kind. You're smart. You care. You take your time to talk to me.Take care of Pat for me please. Stay safe. Love ya bro. I'll return soon. Just need time.

~Virgil.

Hey Remus,

How's Deceit doing? Hope the snake dude is doing good! Hey, I'm really sorry okay? Remus, i know you really scared Thomas last episode but, he will accept you. Thomas isn't going to hate you forever. Sure, it might take some time. But, he will. Lessen the gore and dirty jokes a little though.

Patton learned to deal with you too.

He said that you may be too out-going but that's what makes you you. You don't have a filter but you're amazing the way you are. Your jokes make me crack up. You're sweet and you try your best. Thank you Re, thank you. Have fun and continue being cool.

Love ya trash man. I'm gonna return, not any time soon though.

~Virgil.

Dear Deceit,

Hey Dee. I miss you. A lot. It doesn't seem like that all the time but I do. I miss you a whole lot. The light sides know. They care about my decision. They make me feel better like you did. You're cool Dee. Thomas will accept you. You may seem scary at first but that's okay.

I've been with you for years and I know that you aren't just a liar. You're a friend. A brother. A hero. You're not always a villain. You and Remus were never the villians. You're not one of the dark sides. You're like us.

I love you guys alot. You guys deserve the best in this world. You guys are really cool. Let no one tell you otherwise. Thanks for being there for me when I need it. Love ya big bro. I'll return and give you the biggest hug. I just don't want to right now.

~Virgil.

Dear Dad,

Pat, I'm really sorry. Please forgive me. I'm very sorry. You didn't deserve this but this seemed right for me. You're amazing. Your puns make me laugh. You make a wonderful friend Patton. You deserve a "Patt-on" the back for that. I'm glad you learned how to accept Remus and Dee.

You don't know how much that means to me. You're really loving and caring. I hope you take care of yourself more. Your feelings aren't stupid or dumb. They matter a lot. You make an amazing dad. Your cooking is delicious. You treat us like we're your kids.

Patton. I love you dad. Take care of yourself too. Love ya. Keep being awesome. famILY. I'll come back, not soon though.

~Virgil

Dear Roman,

Roman..i'm really sorry. Please please please, forgive me. You're a really cool guy. You may not think the same but I do. Patton does. Logan does. Deceit does. Thomas does. Even Remus does. You're a lovable dork and that's why you're my closest friend.

You deserve the world Princey. You're amazing. You're cool. You're sweet. Kind. Wonderful. Smart. You're YOU Roman. You're "Really Obviously Mascular And Nice". R-O-M-A-N. I'm glad that we moved our differences away. Sureee, call me out for being cliche. But I'm saying the truth.

You are my best friend. Patton is my dad. Logan is like my brother. Deceit IS my brother. Remus is also my friend. But you, you're my closest friend. My friend. The friend who would look out for me when the others are away.

Roman, I'm sorry but I can't keep my feelings away now. I like love you Roman. I always have. Not the best friend love. Love. Love as in late cuddle sessions and movie nights. Roman. I love you, Roman. I'm sorry that you have to go through this, really I am. But this is what feels right for me, and I hope you understand. I understand if you can't forgive or if you don't love me. I really do.

For now stay safe, this isn't the end. I'll return. Just not soon. Te amo con todo mi corazón.

Lots of l♡ve, Virgil

Silence fills the whole mindscape. Nothing but silence. A pin could drop and everyone would hear. No one dare moves.

Patton's the first to break. He bursts into tears and holds a patch from Virgil's jacket that came with the letter close to him.

Remus follows next. His sobs get louder as he slowly brings up the patch of Virgil's jacket to get a better look at.

Deceit is next, unable to let go of the patch of his little brother's jacket. Every sob came with more pain than the last. It just hurts.

Logan has never felt so broken in his entire life. His whole body shook with choked out sobs as he buries his hair in his hands, staring at the patch in his lap.

Roman, Roman couldn't breathe. He loved Virgil. Virgil was his dream. Roman shook his head in disbelief as his shaky hands held the final patch in his hand. Every sob came faster than the last.

And there left the sides. Missing the only thing that held them together. Patton's son. Remus' best friend. Logan's best friend. Deceit's little brother. Roman's love. Virgil is gone.

When would he come back? And...will he keep to his word?

WOW THAT WAS A RIDEEEEE! First time writing angst, so sorry if it's kinda bad! But liek, did I break your hearts? If I did, I apologize bUT I WANTED TO TRY AND ANGST-

Also sorry for the hella long post!

Anywaysss-

@thesentientmango @the-fangirl-sunstorm @actslikeacat @spoopy-kusuri @books-andbiscuits @flowersandskeletons

Is it okay? Or anything? Pleaseee leaave a comment! I like to hear your opinions! But go easy on me!

Tags

tw cursing tw: angst ts roman ts virgil sympathetic deceit ts deceit ts patton ts logan sympathetic remus prinxiety tw remus tw crying platonic moxiety brotherly anxceit brotherly analogical platonic dukexiety

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nominexiang

2 months ago

You're Telling Me This Thing Is Gonna Be The One To Cook White Lily In Episode 11 (presumably)

you're telling me this thing is gonna be the one to cook white lily in episode 11 (presumably)

also bonus wlily. let women have hobbies. give her a glock

5K notes View Post

nominexiang

4 years ago

Happy bday to our emo boi 💜

Bonus:

Tags

thomas sanders comic sanders sides virgil sanders ts virgil

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nominexiang

4 years ago

Love Letters

Fandom: Sanders Sides Pairing: Dukexiety Characters: Virgil, Remus, everyone else mentioned Notes: Day 14 for @tsshipmonth2020 - dukexiety Summary: When Virgil wrote done his feelings for Remus it was the explicit intention to shred the letter after.

He knew he was forgetting something

AO3

–

To Remus,

I’ve been having feelings. The worst kind of feelings. Super affectionate, really lovey-dovey, terrible feelings. You’d probably laugh in my face if I told you about them.

In fact, you’d definitely laugh in my face. Which is why I’m writing this and not like, talking to you. Because I’m a coward who can’t deal with the fact you’ll reject me.

But I also can’t move on.

Keep reading

Tags

virgil sanders Remus Sandersides anxiety sanders dukexiety duke sanders romantic dukexiety

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nominexiang

4 years ago

FUCKING YESSSSS

Spread the word

Tags

emo ts virgil Sandersides anxiety sanders national emo day

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nominexiang

4 years ago

Six Trillion Years and a Month

(Yes, that title is based off of the vocaloid song "A Tale of Six Trillion Years and a Night")

T.w(s): Characer death, no happy ending, injuries, a brief mention of the coronavirus going around (like one sentence)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A small splash of a small stone into the lake could only be heard by the forest, and a small boy.

It would be followed by birds chirping their sweet songs, and a wistful breeze as the sun rose above the treetops.

The woods were huge, that was obvious. They took up most of the land that the village owned, and they were all too loving and kind to chop it all down.

Good. The boy liked that.

He had been given many names in the past, either from families or legends. Although, he was settling with the name Virgil for now. Or, Vee for short, he guessed.

People knew he existed, he was a citizen of the kingdom just like everyone else. That was not good.

The reason for that being was the village elders being able to recall conversations and moments that they had had with the boy ever since they were kids themselves. So, sadly, his identity and appearance had been changed a few hundred times.

This made people doubt that he was the 15-year-old adolescent he had claimed to be for, literally, eons. Six thousand, actually.

At first, Virgil considered himself to be blessed. That was understandable. It made it a lot easier to block out that the fact he was in no way, shape, or form, human.

He himself didn't even know if he was an animal. Although, when he thought about it, he realised that he sounded stupid.

Well, it was safe to say that Vee was secretly old, very old.

When doing a calculation or two, maybe even older than the universe.

Let's not have an existential crisis about multiverses and al that jazz, and accept that this child was 6 trillion years old.

He is immortal, anyway.

Technically, he was still 15. He had completely stopped aging when he reached the specific age, when his entire family died on his birthday.

Even though he wasn't able to be harmed in almost anyway, and unable to die, that didn't save him from the psychological torture of watching all of the human friends he had somehow obtained dying in front of him.

To him, an average human's 79 year lifespan was a flash of time. So small that he had to physically stop himself from recoiling when one if his teachers told him.

Realizing he'd spaced out remembering the last 6 trillion years completely clearly, the boy decided to head down to the market. Maybe there would be come interesting things on sail.

Virgil had been on earth for around 2,000 years, and the knowledge and morality of humans still amazed him till this very day.

Adjusting the wooly hat on his head and opening his wooden basket, the ancient being's eyes sparkled at the little jewels and trinkets inside. Along with the huge stash of pure golden coins, and a credit card. (Of course, there was a wallet too, but I hope you could guess that.

Vee had never stolen anything for a long time. The last time the hands of the man had taken something that wasn't his as his own was some food his dad had made, when he was still alive.

Every single coin and piece of jewellery was earned by continuous hard work in all different types of jobs over the last two millennia. That was one of his only weaknesses, fatigue. No breathing, food, heat, sleep, or water needed. Although he still used and did all of those things, as they made him feel alive. It was also to stop the suspicions of the mortals living alongside him.

Closing the basket and making his way back to the town, he checked the time on his phone (he was lucky to be able to figure the technology out quickly).

Thu 19 March, 2020.

Well, that helped plummet him back into reality. About the corona thing and all that.

Walking along the trail back into the village took about 5 minutes, and it wasn't like he was complaining. It was a little sunny for once.

That didn't mean it wasn't chilly, sadly.

Even though he was older than the predicted age of the Universe, it didn't mean he knew everything. This was vivid when his eyes didn't catch the shadowy figure hiding behind a tree with a camera.

Though, he would soon. And by soon, I mean a month.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was the angsty Virgil centric I was talking about, I hope you like it!

Words: 788

(When/if I make this a whole fic, it'll be so much more angsty)

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