varinsthottir
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39 posts
Latest Posts by varinsthottir
when smoking in one's garden, one hopes that a little ember would but glance off a slug's wet body and extinguish itself on her slimy belly, not burn a wicked wound in her. but when smoking around the enemy's stronghold, one hopes it would catch some gunpowder left about, and burn the whole thing down in a storm of chance.
me: sigh...
her: babe what's wrong? usually you love doing this
me: *standing at the larger of the two steles that flank the entrance to the land of the dead, listlessly tallying the steady flow of souls and engraving the names of the cruel-hearted among them* idk.. :/
her: aw baby. would it cheer you up if we switched places for a little while?
me: yeah maybe *goes to the stele which records the names of the kind-hearted* hey check this out *puts her name on it*
her: aw! :)
me: :)
spirit of a warrior, slain by his lover after they found themselves on opposite sides of a battle: wails
i heard they're crucifying the insincere tonight
twenty years across the sea
serving hunt
fandom would not be able to handle these two if buffy dropped today
Concept/product art: Cryptid footies
putting my cigarette out on my stupid ass pet rock 🤣🤣🤣 lpve when it whimprs
movie called technically blonde where she goes to trade school instead
You yes you look me in The eyes right now you want to go see furiosa right now. You want to go to the theater and see furiosa a mad max saga director by George miller in Theaters right now. Yes you. You want to go see furiosa right now. It'll be so cool trust me trust me you want to go see furiosa right now in theaters right now. No looks me in the eyes get in your car and drive to the nearest theater and say to them hello yes id like one ticket for furiosa a mad max saga please. actually you should ask for two one for right now and one for tomorrow. When you will go see furiosa a mad max saga again. Yes you look me in the eyes go to the theater right now. You don't have anything else to do I promise you go to the theater and watch furiosa a mad max saga. work is nothing compared to furiosa a mad max saga director by George miller. You yes you look me in the eyes
Idea for a dating app where you get a notification every time someone swipes left. Just makes you feel like absolute shit
reblog to give the person you reblogged this from a kiss on the forehead and a hug to let them know they did a good job today
assassin’s thneed
neither a good girl nor a good boy but a third secret thing
finally got to sit down and read this. as a little treat to me.
it’s the spot on tone, it’s the vibe. kass is such a tricky character to capture bc she’s simultaneously godly, untouchable… &a bleeding fucking heart who would sooner lay down her blade than allow harm to come to you. it’s you knowing EXACTLYhow to speak through her lips for me.
i am living inside ur words - in character and such clear imagery!!!! your kass loves so deeply. i adore the little details you included - the reader feels less like an insert, and more like she was there all along. thank YOU for this
Please, please, please, can we have some Kassandra smut headcanons?
*checks calendar* ahhh! this has been a work in progress for a little over two months. i was never quite happy with where i was headed for the longest time, but i've finally decided to just finish this off and get it over with. i hope you enjoy. ♡
kassandra smut headcanons
18+ // as always, minors/men do NOT interact
✦ i feel like sex with the misthios would be a breathtaking experience (literally)
✦ she loves to be on top, especially when she’s able to hover over you and admire the view… her eyes locking onto yours as her hips relentlessly jut forward and drive the olisbos as deep as she desires, hoping to hear the sweet sounds that are the fuel to her fire
✦ she’s a misthios, so being rough is her forte… and while she does maintain that in bed, she also makes sure to complement her brute force with the occasional gentle stride
✦ expect lots of tender kisses anywhere that she can reach - an act that you’ve grown to love just as much as her taking her pent-up aggression out on your body
✦ just imagine: you’re on your back as kassandra holds both of your hands above your head. her breathing becomes ragged as she grunts praises to you, all the while rearranging your insides
let’s talk about occasion…
✦ when i say that this woman is always in the mood… she is always in the mood. and it doesn’t help that she is absolutely crazy about you… ✨ passion ✨
✦ one evening, she came back to your place after investigating a lead to a powerful mercenary. as soon as she stepped through the doorway, the sight of you preparing some pastries was enough to make her snap and immediately bend you over a nearby surface (there was flour everywhere)
extra fluff ahead
✦ she can get protective and will absolutely teach you how to defend yourself if you need it… but do not expect it to always be genuine teaching moments. she will find all sorts of excuses to get into your chiton (she has also been known to reward your efforts with her mouth)
✦ sometimes, you can hardly get through actual training without being pinned against a nearby surface as kassandra explores the temple that is your body (either way, you both win)
✦ and the training is not because she thinks you’re incapable of protecting yourself!
✦ she unfortunately knows first-hand how dangerous the world can be and would hate for anything to happen to you
✦ eventually, she became confident enough that you would fare mostly unscathed without her. however, she still preferred that she accompany you on rigorous missions. i mean, how much safer can you get than to be by the side of your deific lover?
✦ going on missions together even led to a tradition that you both honor any chance you get
✦ one that you would never tell anyone about… (although she might)
✦ you would clear out an area and notice that smug look (one she happily flashed) appear on her face as she beckoned you closer to her
✦ a misthios has to be prepared for any and all scenarios - anything from winning the favor of a pirate queen to indulging in the occasional impromptu makeout sesh with her lover
✦ and it did not matter where you were and who was around (perhaps she is a little sadist)
✦ one moment, she was spearing her way through enemy defences and then the next, she was spearing you on her olisbos
✦ the weight of the world felt lighter on her shoulders as soon as your fingernails dug into them
✦ it became an obsession - to hear your sweet moans as she hit the right spot inside of you, to drown herself in the divine honey that would seep once she did it well enough, and to allocate her time into ensuring that these cycles remained endless… truly a necessity
✦ worshipping your body is a given; kassandra would take one look at you and swear she was blessed by the gods
✦ her reactions may comprise of taking you in a temple and having you scream her name like a prayer, among other things…
blurb
you unsheathed your daggers as you followed kassandra closely towards the bandit camp. kassandra stopped in her tracks before you got too close and looked up at ikaros, who gave a call of approval to proceed. kassandra grabbed her bow from its position on her back and you both slowly approached the opening between the stakes surrounding the base. she readied her weapon and aimed it towards a far-away enemy. before releasing the arrow, she caught your attention and motioned you towards a scout who was observing the perimeter. carefully, you snuck up behind him and took him out, hiding his body in a nearby bush. you popped out once the immediate coast was clear and kassandra followed swiftly behind. you both proceeded to take out all other enemies in sight with your ranged weapons. once you were sure it was safe, ikaros gave a call to warn of a nearby treasure and you both followed the signal. as you approached the treasure, a rogue bandit attempted to sneak up behind you but ikaros swooped in at the right time and attacked him. you looked around again for good measure and concluded that you and kassandra were alone. you headed towards a large tent that housed the treasure you sought. upon entering the tent, kassandra scanned the room and then turned to you with her famous smug look. you glanced back at her with a puzzled expression and she drew your attention towards a nearby table in the corner of the tent. you felt a blush come across your face as she grabbed your hand and led you towards the table. once you were both in front of it, she turned you around so that your back was against it. she moved her hands to cradle your face and placed a kiss upon your lips. without saying a word, she moved her lips to your neck and began littering kisses all over your exposed skin. she leaned down and hooked her arms underneath your thighs, picking you up and then placing you onto the table. you wrapped your arms around her neck as she returned her lips to yours. your legs wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer to you as you both drank each other’s moans.
…and that’s how a simple retrieval mission can turn sultry.
god forbid anybody dare question the two of you, insinuating that you don’t value their time or money… kassandra will have none of it.
“tell me,” she’ll say as she steps closer to them. you make sure to stay close behind should anything go wrong. “if your lover were as divine as mine, wouldn’t you spend all of your free-time pleasing her?” the nervous employer would meet your gaze for a quick second before kassandra closes the gap even further. “it’s only right for me to give my thanks to this goddess as she accompanies me on missions. it’s also a bonus to christen our new bases.”
author’s note: if you’ve made it this far, ilysm. i hope you have a lovely day/afternoon/evening/night. 💗✨
I want a shirt that’s like those y2k blinged out baby ts but it says butch bait in rhinestones
me parting the red sea of cool gifsets to find the cum inflation reader inserts
me in the fandom tag wading through a thousand omegaverse, yandere, cum inflation reader insert fics in order to find a cool gifset i saw 3 years ago
uwuing is not a victimless crime
her when she 😦😐😮
kassandra ✨
i love lesbians. lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian lesbian
💗💕💖 for being kind and lovely, have a kiss on the forehead! pass it on to 10 people 💖💕💗
💖🧡💓💙💖🖤💘💚❣️💜💓❤️🔥❤️🔥💙💗 oh these??? these are my uwus. all for you
sword lesbian this gun bisexual that. what about the axe lesbian
9 people i want to get to know better!!! ft formatting on mobile 😍🙏
(thank u again fellow icarly ASMR enjoyer 💕 @xthescarletbitch)
last song: the entirety of kate bush’s “the dreaming”, specifically pull out the pin
last show: alone on the history channel (i love trees)
currently watching: alone on the history channel but the next season (i love trees)
currently reading: several things due to the untreated adhd!!!! the picture of dorian gray, the way the crow flies, anansi’s boys
current obsession: mainlining abby since 2020 but the recent additions of eivor, kass + sevika have really spiced things up
sorry to tag ppl who have already been tagged. but i really mean it (ง’̀-‘́)ง @twdimagining @retronamic @losingherface @mrsdanirojas @tlouflicksvp @alcinas-darling @misspearly1 @idwtet @bvibrato 🌬💕
Nine People I Want To Get To Know Better~!!
Thank you for the tag darling💗: @gabrielsellesty
Last song: Renegade - Aaryan Shah
Last show: “กรงกรรม” It’s a Thai television series and I am OBSESSED
Currently watching: Not watching any shows at the moment
Currently reading: Last Night At The Telegraph Club by Malinda Lo
Current obsession: How To Train Your Dragon lmao lowkey wanna have a dragon pet + Toothless is adorable
Tagging💗: @chrysanthemumwrld @kingofzaun @thehoundwrites @sevikasmainwhore @sevikasangel @cassifictional @alcinas-darling @sxpphicfxiry @sevikaspillowprincess
thinks about canon she/they eivor
cannot emphasize how much i have been thinking about this for 2 days and 2 nights. oh m god
Author’s Note: Hello all, this has been in the works for quite a while! Like half a year, but I’ve finally figured out where I want to go with it, what the plot is, etc.. This is a 2 part prologue, I like it I feel like it gives a good build up to when we actually see Eivor. It may not be what you were expecting but I like it! Enjoy and let me know what you think!
AO3 link - here
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