Gmmtv - Blog Posts

To those who can't watch horror shows

Guys we finally got what we wanted and we're not talking about it enough

I'm seeing people talk about dream female Only Friends cast and now I cannot stop thinking about my perfect Ray and Sand: Pat Chayanit and Fah Yongwaree.

(x)(x)

I just know Pat can do both Ray's annoying, rich boy vibes and also all the emotional nuance and depth.

(x)(x)

And I'm picturing Fah in a look similar to Jean from The Warp Effect, I think she would make a perfect Sand.

(x)(x)

We already know they work well together and have a nice chemistry.

And I know they can also pull off the heartwrenching and emotional scenes.

(x)(x)

I am craving something that will consume my soul.

Preferably something gay and produced in an Asian country

I need gmmtv to release something gay and dramatic STAT cuz im having a withdrawal rn please please give me some new gays

rooftop kisses will be the end of me

A lot of people in the fandom were mad at Sand for not drawing the line right away and sorta slumbering through Boeing's entire slut agenda but folks

As someone who identifies so strongly with Sand as a character I was happy to see Ray step up and claim him so shamelessly, so confidently. Because saviors also need saving sometimes, and this was the reassurance Sand needed. This was Ray proving he was all in and not only for his own sake. Sure Sand should have established boundaries right away but damn it give him a break. It was meh morally but it was okay, it was understandable. He's got issues of his own, he is not there just to serve Ray's arc

Ray is like "Oh yeah my boyfriend is still in love with his ex" after watching Sand go into complete autopilot and giving the most dead fish kiss to Boeing

Like bro he kissed you right after that and it was like he was deprived of oxygen and you were his oxygen mask

yall we as a fandom are losing our shit

do you think we'll get gmmtv to reconsider their implicit veto on gl shows if we think hard enough

Let's try to manifest a good gl

I'm seeing people talk about dream female Only Friends cast and now I cannot stop thinking about my perfect Ray and Sand: Pat Chayanit and Fah Yongwaree.

(x)(x)

I just know Pat can do both Ray's annoying, rich boy vibes and also all the emotional nuance and depth.

(x)(x)

And I'm picturing Fah in a look similar to Jean from The Warp Effect, I think she would make a perfect Sand.

(x)(x)

We already know they work well together and have a nice chemistry.

And I know they can also pull off the heartwrenching and emotional scenes.

(x)(x)

Thank you to Sand for being my role model

He's someone I relate to very much and I see so much of my romantic tendencies in him

Only he does draw boundaries. He does have self-respect. He refuses to give up his integrity

Thank you so much maybe I do have a chance at a fulfilling relationship

I am not ready for anyone's opinions honestly, but I just have to say this: as someone who has an alcoholic sibling, there is only so much you can do to stop an addict.

I mean, the friend group is shitty. I don't see the love or loyalty one expects from a friend group. Frankly, I don't think any of them have ever taken Ray's addiction seriously, but we do not know if they ever tried to help.

At some point you become exhausted. At some point, you realize the person you care about will not quit if they don't want to.

And Ray does have agency. He did not have to bring drugs to the party. His dellusions explain his behavior but do not justify it.

I'm very angry with Ray this week I'm sorry. This show is hitting too close to home

Next week's preview makes next week worth living

Only I hate the fact that Sand is the one confessing. I hate it. He deserves to be confessed to. He deserves to be chased after. Ray needs to fucking repent because he's fucked up so many times and Sand needs to be less forgiving

I am so normal about Sand it's not like I relate to him or anything

Many people in the fandom are convinced that SandRay won't get a happy ending because it's 'not a bl' and it's 'realistic'. First of all, even I, the resident hopeless romantic, understand that realism is not the same as pessimism. Second of all, it's P'Jojo we're talking about. He loves giving people happy endings after a couple of tragic twists and time jumps. Just think about Bad Buddy or Never Let Me Go and their endings. I am a SandRay-is-endgame truther, because of the reasons listed above and because I will bawl my eyes out in the case they don't end up together.

That's why I'm so sensitive about Sand. I relate to him so much it hurts. He's a person who has learned that there's no point in expecting anything from people. He doesn't see himself as anyone special, as someone who can be "the one". He takes responsibility for his feelings and doesn't blame anyone for being hurt. But he feels so,so much. He cares more than he can take and more than others can appreciate. He's doomed to get hurt and I am too.

And that is absolutely tragic

You know what absolutely kills me about this? Sand doesn't even look surprised. He isn't teary or wide-eyed. It's a look of pure disappointment. The kind that says he knew this would happen from the start, and he's utterly powerless to stop it.

While seeing Sand breaking down in tears would have been devastating, there's something very achy about this reaction. It's hard to put into words.

Today is the day

The day a new episode of only friends comes out

The only thing that kept me afloat for the entire week

If I don't get some resolution to SandRay's fight I will drown my sorrows in soju

Actually everything on tumblr is about Ray and Sand from only friends

I love characters that think they can't allow themselves to love or be loved

just to have someone stride into their life to turn that concept upside down

GMMTV really decided to produce a show which on the surface level is about messy queers fucking the brains out of each other but on the deeper level is really about the power dynamics in queer relationships and how important having control is for so many people

it's the way Top is used to having the upper hand, but in his new relationship it's Mew who has control

it's the way Sand is so afraid of losing control over his own emotions in his relationship with Ray, but he's bound to catch feelings, we all know it

it's the way Boston doesn't get attached to anyone but loses control in his pursuit of Top

it's all about who's got the power, who protected their heart the best

okay but this LOOK

the look after Ray asked Sand if he found him attractive

First I applaud you for mastering the "trying to remain calm and collected while being horny" face

I can't believe I didn't pick up on it in the first episode but Mew is such a proficient manipulator for someone so young and inexperienced. He likes having control, and I'm surprised Top is actually sticking around. He must be so sure of himself his confidence makes him blind to Mew's tricks. Either that or it makes the challenge more interesting and the conquest more gratifying for him, so he's just waiting to take the trophy home.

I am Mew and Mew is me

Seriously, the guy:

1. Doesn't want a one-night stand because he knows he'll fall hard

2. Apologises to the guy he didn't hook up with because you know he got his hopes up and all

3. Brings said guy to a bookshop the next day and talks about his love for reading

4. Is extremely cute and wears glasses

Gmmtv I am gonna sue you for identity theft because what is this

people who discover gay soap operas never go back to western media

my silly little gay shows satisfy my need for queer stories with low stakes zero deaths and a lot of fucking

gmmtv the sponsor of my daily fix of gayness

the fact that RWRB came out the same week on only friends is so fuckin funny to me because people who only watch western media are really so desperate for queer content that ive seen people waxing poetic about so many (non) things meanwhile i'm out here SCREAMING at the top of my lungs because Mark Pakin violated privacy laws to put a sexy selfie onto a customer's phone and WON

When your gay uncle is homophobic

“We’re not like parents in tv dramas”

Right, more like parents in Shakesperian tragedies

I can only agree

Nanon’s acting in this scene was breathtaking.

The subtlety and nuanced approach he took to containing Pran’s sorrow and tears was incredible. He sustained Pran’s struggle to keep from crying and maintained his composure until the perfect moment.

The audience could see Pran struggling but Pat couldn’t and that was so believable. The tears are waiting to tumble from Pran’s eyes were there but were small enough for Pat to not notice, something that is amazing to see as a viewer.

There are so many layers to his performance as Pran, whether it’s his approach to the lines, the micro mannerisms and gestures he uses to show the audience how Pran is actually feeling.

This scene made the audience share in Pran’s pain, whether you wanted to or not. It wasn’t a question of feeling what Pran was feeling. Nanons performance immersed you in it and reached beyond the confines of the screen.

me: *crying*

friend: what’s going on? why are you crying?

me: *gestures vaguely towards thailand* 

“I didn’t know you had a romantic side…”

The answer was as simple as that. Mork was incapable of threatening this friendship the more they spend time together.

The more they spend time together, the more fearful he was of his feelings, knowing well one wrong move would pull Pi several steps back that he took his time taking.

Especially after knowing how hard it was for the latter to trust people. They had a rough start all because he couldn't talk in truths. He still wasn't when he told Pi he was a friend every time looking at those round eyes and soft cheeks.

He couldn't put what they had at risk for something he wasn't sure about. 

And that was the reason precisely why he pushed every thought of leaning closer when they were only inches apart. Because no matter how close he wanted to lean in, he had to step away before things get out of hand.

Sometimes it felt so pointless, as if the possibility of them getting together was a fading light at the end of a tunnel.

Some mornings he woke up thinking all about those 'What If's' he couldn't answer himself. 

Other time there was a sudden urge to shove all his secrets inside a box and lock them away for good because at this point, being friends was way better than loosing Pi in any sort of way.

When he could feel Pi's warmth and wanted nothing but wrap his arms around the latter, forming a shield to hide him away from this cruel world.

Or the way his intrusive thoughs won over his self control on his weak days as his traitrous hands would make their way to fix that one strand of hair falling over Pi's forehead just right to poke him in the eyes.

They way his figures twitched to reach out and wipe the corner of his mouth when he messily ate something.

And these little feeling would erupt every time he saw Pi doing something as trivial as taking food to his table. Or simply sitting side by side studying. Or replying to his text. Talking about his shitty day.

To the point it would travel all through his body like crackling electricity, make his fingertips tingle until he had to remove himself from close proximity of Pi.

Keep his thoughts at bay, in the dark, whenever he felt words flowing inside his brain.

Swallowing bits of the acidic feeling when he would slip up and reveal the truth.

How could he so obvious and Pi be so oblivious.

..

A bit angsty.

A bit of slow burn

We all love these little guilty pleasures.

My Book-'Levitating Towards You' on Ao3, more refined and edited.

A bit angsty tags_

#One-sided enemies to friends to lovers

#Slow building romance

#Emotional hurt

#A bit depressing

#Dark thoughts happen at some point

#Feelings denial

#Triggering subjects

#Past traumas

#Unhealthy coping mechanism

#Mild mention of bullying

But it also has_

#Humor

#Satire

#Fluff

#Sarcasm

#Happy ending

#Healthy relationship building

#Enemies to Friends to Lovers

#Stupid cheesy flirting

#Eventual stupid but iconic confessions

#Developing feelings

#Mild sexual content

#Sloppy make out

#Drunk shenanigans and confessions

#Declaration of love

#Domestic shit happens out of nowhere

#We have side couples? Maybe

#Mentions of other Bl series in between as other characters make cameos!!!

#Everyone is gay- Yuppie!

My writing isn't the greatest but I try.

Please consider reading it.

I really need the motivation.

'Do we really know the truth behind someone's lies? Is it fair to lie to someone you care about because of your own fears?'

"Do we really know how to differentiate between Romantic and Platonic Love? Should we? Could we?"

'Is it alright to want someone who looks so far, out of reach?'

So many question. So many answers....

Ao3 account-Paint_the_sky_18

Thoughts for Today - Ep. 1-3 of The Heart Killers (BL)

Hey guys. I know, it’s been a fresh minute since I’ve used this blog, well besides for looking at posts without doing some of my own. Trust, I plan to fix that starting today. Don’t expect super frequent posts as I am still in school (cries in final exams) but I do want to be more active here, especially regarding some works I have cooking that I want to share as well as shows I want to rant about. Which brings us to today’s icebreaker, the recent Heart Killers BL series.

And my thoughts so far? I honestly am in love with this series. Might be one of my favorite off all time so far, and that’s saying something coming from a Kinnporsche glazer, rightfully so that series is also incredible. So I’m going to rant about the episodes so far and some other topics I’ve seen floating around the show. So strap in cause I got quite a few things to saw if you’re interested.

EP. 1 - Great start to the series in my opinion. I loved the character intros and all of them are perfect to showing the audience that these are not good people. Extremely morally grey and paints the way to great character development. Makes them more realistic, as people in real life are often morally grey as well, dirty and complex, just like these characters. Brings an element of realism to an otherwise campy and sometimes goofy show about assassins and deceit. Also yes, have to talk about the KantBison scene. Now, I havent watched too much of their work, only pieces from their shows, but from I could see they had great chemistry and it’s on full display here. Their scene was passionate, raw. Another praise to give to the show is how openly sexual it is and I love it. Also loved the dynamics they’ve at that point, Bison being the dreamer, Fadel the reluctant, older brother who does what he thinks is best, Style an annoying but lovable diva, and Kant, a liar who’s doing it for the greater good of his brother. The tension as well between Fadel and Style, chef’s kiss. Can’t wait to see one of them break. Overall, had a great time with the first episode.

EP. 2 - Have to say, the most campy episode so far. But I’m not complaining, Style of course being the reason for this. I got to say, usually I hate characters like this, the overly annoying ones to smother and don’t respect boundaries, so I’m shocked to find that Style is still as lovable to me as ever. I think it’s because of the added subtext that at first, he’s only really doing this for his best friend and his car. So he’s doing it with the benefit of the reward after. It’s messed up and keeps up with the theme of toxicity in this show. And it’s also hilarious to see Fadel have the patience of a saint and put up with his shenanigans. Hell, even giving him money for his products he ‘dumped.’ The tension between the two is great and got even better during the sauna scene. So many thoughts for that, super hot. It showed Fadel being the most giving to Style since they first met, makes sense since that only happens when the two are alone. He leans into his touch almost, closes his eyes and just lets himself feel Style’s hand on him. At least, till Uncle comes in and ruins it. Style basically being the ‘Ricky, when I catch you Ricky’ to him was hilarious. Till we go to the unconsensual kiss. Now, again, makes sense character wise since Style has been described as shameless in his attempts to pursue someone but I like how the show portrays it as something thats still not right. I love that the show isn’t afraid to delve into heavy subjects like this and still manage to portray them in a bad light without romanticizing them like other BL shows. It fits the tone of the series perfectly and I love it. Especially when we got to the end of the episode of Fadel’s fun time to himself. Hot as well, shame we lost a soldier so early. The post nut clarity hitting him hard afterward also made me chuckle out loud. It’s ok, we’ve all have our rough days. The Kant and Bison stuff was also very sweet, Kant paying off his friend to flirt with Bison to make it more convincing to him is a level of dedication I can’t even hate on. Proud of my toxic boy. Love how they’re still learning to trust each other, more Bison to Kant really, showing that he’s not as naive as some might think. Again, had fun with this episode as well as can’t wait for the next.

EP. 3 - Wow, def need to touch some grass after this episode. Here I thought nothing would top the Fadel fun time scene last episode but here we are. Now, there is a lot to say about this episode as got a good amount of info this time. We got introduced to ‘Mother’ who is actually worse than I expected her to be. It’s clear that she doesn’t give a damn about these boys (at least so far), merely using their ‘love’ as a means of manipulation to have the boys blindly follow her orders and take our her enemies. Reminds me of Tony from Pitbabe just gender bent. Showing the outsider brother, sorry I forgot his name at the moment, clearly being set up as a foil for the assassin brothers and I’m interested to see where they take him. Also, lore drop on Fadel? So boy wasn’t just rightfully paranoid, he lost an ex bf in this line of work and poor boy doesn’t want the same happening for his brother. Makes sense since at the beginning of the episode, he covered for Bison and lied about him seeing someone. Another cute brotherly moment besides from the one later one where he tells Bison he’ll help him get out of this so he can have a normal life. I swear, I love these two so much. And of course, more Style annoying Fadel, my favorite pastime. Jk but Fadel being used to it at this point is hilarious. Also loved how Style went to help Fadel and then proceeding to make the boy nervous when he changed into the uniform in the kitchen. Like Style, if only you knew the true effect you had over this boy. Fadel was practically drooling at the mouth looking away from him to stop getting horny. More cute scenes between Kant and Bison but unfortunate when Kant had to report back to Captain who suggests getting into their home instead. Mission failed successfully? (Iykyk). The club scene with Fadel was amazing, Style is right when he says that he’s handsome to be making like that on the side. But when he started imagining he was in fron of Fadel instead of the woman? They’re literally soulmates your honor, two minds think alike. Interesting though that after Fadel saved him from those three after the club, he’s switches on wanting to sleep with him to actually wanting to know more about him. His suspicions opposite to Kant’s, who wants to date Bison for the reason of staying out jail, to Style, who actually wants to know more about Fadel, what makes him tick and to let his walls down. So makes sense when they finally have sex, he’s not enjoying as much as he would’ve before he changed his goal about him. The whole sex scene actually, while still good, feels underwhelming for those two and it should be. Fadel’s doing it because he claims it’ll get Style off him, which lets be fr, he’s dying for that cookie since that last episode, so he feels this is mandatory and not into it as much as he would be if he actually vulnerable with Style. To which Style picks up on. He looks attentive, not as in the moment as one think he would be because he knows Fadel isn’t doing this because he really likes Style but because he feels like he has to. It’s more interesting than it is erotic and I love how the direction for that scene was. And the punch to Style after? Much deserved cause I did not like that whole grief club scene. Maybe to was to further hit home that Style isn’t a good person or maybe this foreshadowing for something, idk. I’m not a fan and it seems I’m not the only one. However, I can’t say the same for the ending of the show. The BDSM scene. Now the show is filled with triggers, stated that very early on, as early as the trailers so this didn’t surprise me too much. The roofing however, was interesting but makes sense since Kant needs to get more evidence at their house. But when the tables flipped, it catches him off guard. Him clearly hesitant and somewhat scared at first but not saying anything cause he’s far in to give up now. But to him starting to melt into and possibly feeling good was another level of spice I welcomed. I have so much more to say but maybe I’ll save that for after the series is over for a full analysis.

Overall, the series is so much fun and entertaining, the level of tension, incoming angst and storytelling is all wonderfully done and it leads me to being excited for the next coming week and how they’re going to redeem this band of morally grey men. That’s what character development is for. If they started out as goody two shoes then the show would be boring. The element of realism in the toxicity and deceit all these characters have is honestly what’s setting up for some amazing drama to come and it boggles my mind that some people are using that reason to drop the show. The show was very clear that it would go into some heavy subject matter and people hating the show on that are the reason we can’t have nice things. I understand not wanting to watch the show due to some of its triggers but calling the show ‘bad’ because of these reasons is absolutely ridiculous. There are other shows who try to go into this subject matter but don’t have the good writing Heart Killers have to pull it off. Sorry for the rant but had to get it off my chest.

All in all, watch the series if you can handle the heavy subject material as it’s definitely worth the watch. And don’t if you don’t! We all have our preferences but don’t hate something when it isn’t finished yet please. Let’s spread love, not hate. But I think I’ve all I wanted to say. Can’t wait till next week cause the show is getting good.

See you all in the next post, my marvels. Bye!

oh wow okay was anyone going to tell me bad buddy was like THAT

sotus and sotus s were kinda way ahead of their time and nobody is ready for this conversation

Yes it did receive appreciation for being a trendsetter of university setting in BLs but the criticisms on lack of intimacy is getting on my nerves.

First of all, the main focus seems to be on the senior-junior struggle with hazing and the characters' internal struggles. THE AIM WAS NOT FANSERVICE AT ALL.

With that being said, it is completely normal for them to NOT be all over each other on screen even in season 2. Portraying emotional intimacy is harder than physical & it's done beautifully. They are two boys trying to graduate and do well in their jobs, it's absurd for them to come home and be all energetic in bed.

The relationship is actually balanced in its own way. Arthit gets a lot of hate for not communicating enough. When it actually does not seem like the case. Because in s2 he tells Kong "We can normally talk about anything, right?" That actually shows they are close enough to have tough conversations without jeopardising their relationship. Arthit knows since s1 that Kong is a rich kid, only he never know who exactly his father was.

Moreover Arthit's introversion & mysteriousness is what seems to draw Kong to him. We see how possessive Kong is - he cannot stand anyone else knowing little details such as pink milk & Aioon. I bet he'd not like him if Arthit was an easily likeable popular extrovert. The fact that Arthit is visibly shy is enough for Kong. And the fact that Arthit does not say "I love you" or "You are my world" regularly is what makes his words more valuable. Because Kong knows that it means beyond the surface in a situation when he says it.

It's good that Arthit continues to be shy & silent even in s2. Because that shatters the most common misconception that people change. He himself says that he loves Kong regardless, and saying it everyday would only reduce its importance. (Also, he's shy & that's how he is. Kongpob can accept it so it's all good innit?) Despite taking a long time to deal with his inner struggles he always comes back. He doesn't go around announcing about his relationship, but he does not keep it a secret forever either.

And the fear of society is actually well portrayed. University & workplace is different. Your sexual orientation doesn't reflect on your academic reports, but it CAN reflect as workplace discrimination. We also see that Arthit slowly realises that nobody is gossiping like he imagined. That's how he learns how pointless his worries were.

There are other shattered stereotypes. Such as the owner's nephew being a hard worker unlike the general nepotism character. And Earth just taking her time to warm up instead of turning out to be the female villian.

With all this being said, the show has a balance of silly entertainment & realistic ish character growth, idk it's a hill I'm willing to die on kbye.