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I don’t even know what to do, I miss them so bad, Almost two years 95% long distance. We’ve never spent valentines together

I miss them so fucking much, I wish I could see them, Even if it was just for a day

And video calls aren’t the same, I need it to be in person

I need them here with me.. It’s just not possible…

ARAGORN & LEGOLAS at ARAGORN'S CORONATION

Childhood friends Steddie this, childhood friends Steddie that!

When will we see childhood friends Stobin!?

They meet at Headstart because the Harringtons want to give their child as much of a leg up on his peers as possible and the Buckleys know that their daughter is incredibly bright, and with the preschool, she could probably start kindergarten a year early.

On day one Steve shows off the lunch his nanny made him, a PB&J cut up into a star shape, a mandarin fruit cup, and a homemade cookie. Robin is insanely jealous of the cookie and starts trying to convince Steve that he should give it to her, only she's already showing signs of becoming a rambler later in life so she trips over the words and it all comes out as a garbled mess that Steve can't make out.

Still, Steve is a kind boy and this girl looks like she's getting really frustrated and maybe even like she's going to cry and Jill, his nanny, packed him a second cookie in another bag for him to give to he first friend he makes on his first day of preschool. He doesn't know if he wants to be friends with this girl, but she seems upset and cookies make everything better.

The cookie does, in fact, make everything better.

Steve and Robin spend the whole day sitting side by side holding hands and running around. The adults around them coo and say weird things about young love that Steve doesn't really pay attention to and Robin crinkles her nose up at. She thinks boys have cooties, but Steve is ok because he's her friend and he's not as gross as the other boys.

By the time Jill and the Buckleys come to pick up their charges, Robin and Steve are wearing matching, wonky friendship bracelets they spent all of craft time on. Robin's is made of blue poney beads because she told Steve that was her favorite color and it had little plastic charms of a bluebird, an ice cream cone, a lime green dinosaur, and a bead with the letter 'S' on it. Steve's is yellow with lots of star beads, an orange dinosaur, a charm that looks like a banana, and a bead with the letter "R" on it.

They head home wearing big smiles, ready for another day of preschool with their best friend.

Its never been about her she’s not the reason I feel down,

I just get so fucking tired having nobody around.

I push myself to push myself and what’s it even for?

I’m looking at the future and it’s filled with broken doors,

And they don’t lead to anywhere I’m lost inside a maze.

Just trying to find a home but maybe home is heaven’s gates.

So I try and fight the feeling and I take another shot,

In hopes it clears my brain before I try and take a, shot.

Yeah, it’s a little harder than you think,

I smile for the camera but inside I feel so weak.

I talk about these fakes, but the fake is really me.

Battling depression since before I was thirteen.

And none would ever guess because I wore the biggest smile.

No one would have guessed because I’m always running wild.

But every night’s a struggle and I cry myself to sleep.

They think I’m on a diet but I really just can’t eat.

So I sit here by myself as I put my thoughts down into words,

My anxiety is killing me and my skin it starts to burn,

I try and hold it back but tears flood like swimming pools

For so long it’s been over but I hold on like a fool.

When I say she's literally in my mind 🪄❤️‍🔥

And maybe you’ll never quite understand what you did to me

And maybe I’ll have to live with that

And maybe...just maybe,

That will be okay

~ excerpts of me moving on ~