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Sometimes I think about putting my essays on substack or something but the idea of getting no views while actively feeding the ai scrapbot makes me want to
So.
ON FICTIONAL ESSAYS, AND WORLDBUILDING
I love writing. That is a truth; one that I will hold onto for probably my whole life.
I really do love writing, especially for my baby. It is a behemoth of a book that I’d started when I was 11, and continued adding onto it until I started actually writing it when I was 17. I have too many ideas—too many headcannons, too many bits of lore that I want to incorporate into my story.
Again, I think I need to reiterate—I really do love writing. That doesn’t mean I don’t get tired of it. I will go weeks, sometimes even months where I don’t want to even touch it. Where the thought of writing and seeing that cursor just … blink makes me shudder.
But just because I don’t want to write the story doesn’t mean I don’t want to continue with my lore.
Here is another thing about me: I love history. It was my favourite subject at school. I got an A* in it. I love how history is rich, how it’s a long, long story that is still continuing. I love thinking about how people felt. How a decision made hundreds of years ago (if not thousands!) impacts us today.
I also, secretly (guiltily) love essays. Oh, sure I complained about it with my friends whenever it got assigned. But doing the research, finding the right words to articulate your thoughts, being able to read back on your writing—sometimes even just formatting an essay—I really did love it.
And that brings us to the topic I wanted to start today.
Fictional essay writing.
When I can’t stand the thought of writing the actual story, I open a blank document and start writing an essay as though I’m a character in my book needing to write a history assignment. I add actual quotes (albeit fictional), use actual dates, even reference as though I’m the character.
It can be therapeutic sometimes. There’s no pressure to move the plot forward, no anxiety over pacing or character arcs. It’s world-building, but in a reflective way. A way that forces me to know the world I’ve created as deeply as the characters do. It makes me question my decisions, makes me stopper up plot holes.
Sometimes reading back my work—it reads as though a seasoned academic had written it. But they hadn’t—I wrote it. I wrote that battle, that political treaty, that royal lineage. It makes me strangely proud of myself; as though I’ve actually done the work to research and trawl through endless websites until I’ve snagged on one that actually fits my essay. As though I’ve spent hours agonising over it, and sending draft after draft to a professor.
It makes the world feel alive, like it’s breathing outside of the story I’m struggling to write.
And it’s funny, because half the time those essays never make it into the book. They’re tucked away in a folder no one but me will ever read. But I know they’re there. I can always re-read them when I feel the need to; when I’ve forgotten a simple fact, or a food or a certain dialect.
It really is very useful—and it helps that I love it.
MJ’s Substack
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Excerpt from 'For you I am a child'
I couldn’t see the letters my hand formed, black against blue on black, but I knew they were there. After this blind exercise was completed, I returned the pen and wrapped my cold feet back into the blanket. Now, it was easy to fall asleep, and if I dreamed that night, I do not remember.
If a poem can be anything, I could’ve written anything. How to make avocados ripe, directions to a church of law, a vow, an elegy, how to rig a sailboat, fold a fortune teller, French inhale, sin, make good oatmeal, kiss without teeth, escape self-delusion, write a novel, give a blowjob, be less, be more, leave everything behind, get blood stains out of white sheets, hold eye contact, not get lost in New York City, find the nearest body of water, win at solitaire, be alone, write in dip pen, build a portal, be with others, float, harmonize, unlearn shame, learn guilt, . . .
Excerpt from 'I might say something stupid'
This summer was spent hotboxing my closet and eating mangoes on the living room couch. I forgot things as soon as people said them.
Nothing bad has ever happened. Not to me then and not to me now. I scrub at the wine stain on my jersey. I love open bar events.
I spent two weeks as a camp counselor even though looking at children makes me feel sick to my stomach. In each one I see myself and wonder how anyone ever hurt me.
The path forward is power—not through proximity, but through possession. Not by begging men to be better captors, but by becoming better architects. Women have to start designing their lives with intention, rejecting every dependency that leaves them voiceless, and refusing to perform weakness just to feel safe. Because safety bought through submission is a scam. It’s a temporary peace built on the condition that you never grow.
From: What's the holdup on getting rid of patriarchy? | ensainte
(Finally. A young lady who writes like she goes outside.)
I do not know who James Burks is, but I was recommended an artistic post of a stop motion this James Burks made. When I looked at it, liked it, and his message to continue making art was meaningful. So, I thought to share it with you.
I am torn between completely ignoring everything going on and obsessing over it. I cannot find a middle ground. I feel like all mainstream media is now being censored and so am finding alternate sources like Substack and Discord. Reddit seems to be under the gun now and important subreddits are starting to disappear.
So I am putting this article forward for you, my followers, and to keep it close. No, I could not read the entire thing. My anxiety level became unbearable and I had to stop.
I just went through an 8 month process to finally get off Lexapro and I am not going to allow this administration to put me back on it!
Quietly losing my mind over the fact that Elon Musk has straight up orchestrated a coup of our executive branch and like....I don't even know what, if any, system we have in place to fix this. Like... He's just taken control of the money and locked out the actual appointed officials. What the fuck.
𝘏𝘦𝘺 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘴 🌺,
𝘚𝘰 𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘰𝘯 𝘚𝘶𝘣𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘢 𝘣𝘪𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘐 𝘥𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘱𝘭𝘰𝘢𝘥 𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘣𝘢𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦. 𝘐𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘶𝘺𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘪𝘵. 𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵.
This piece by my high school prom date gets at why I decided to compartmentalize my childhood dreams of becoming a published writer into Vocal Media (link here: https://vocal.media/authors/james-bao-1)
Guys, where do you get your book recs? And do you have recs? (Of books or of bootuber/ig/substack/podcast/...)
Guys, where do you get your book recs? And do you have recs? (Of books or of bootuber/ig/substack/podcast/...)
This is probably common knowledge that my space-case reclusive ass just learned recently. I am a Killing Eve/Codename Villanelle fanatic, how did I miss this? 🤨 Anyway, Luke Jennings wrote a new Villanelle novella in installments on Substack where Villanelle did not die and she and Eve are living in St. Petersburg. He wrote it because,
“Villanelle, for all her winning ways, is a homicidal psychopath, and transgressive characters often come to a sticky end on the screen. There’s a long history in film and TV of the same treatment being meted out to one or both members of same-sex couples, a trope known to LGBTQ+ audiences as Bury Your Gays. Killing Eve’s fanbase was, and is, acutely attuned to such issues. I know this because many of them have contacted me. The Killing Eve universe is their escape, they tell me, and Villanelle their heroine. Not because she murders people, but because she’s powerful, she’s her own creation, and she goes through life doing exactly as she choses.
The TV series ending, in which Villanelle is shot by a sniper and falls dying into the Thames, came as a shock to emotionally invested fans, and they were not slow to voice their feelings. Social media lit up with their distress, not for days, but for weeks. All over the world, makeshift shrines to Villanelle appeared, with flowers, heartfelt messages, stills from the TV show, and copies of my books. A group of fans crowdfunded a billboard in central London, protesting at “the trope”. As Villanelle’s creator, this was weird, touching and extraordinary, and I felt I had to react.”
- Luke Jennings from an article in The Guardian in 2023
It’s called Killing Eve: Resurrection and is available on his Substack page for free. He also wrote a new installment after called Killing Eve: Bloodline. I’m just gonna leave the 1st link in case anyone missed it and so I can find it again easily if I need to for some reason. I am almost finished with the last book, then I am starting on these. He has a lot of other cool posts on his account.
I wrote this for my girlfriend on Valentine's Day 💌
I tried to write a haiku yesterday for the first time since I was a kid :)
A small writing of mine abt my childhood ^_^ Check it out!
Part six of my story What ever happened? is out on substack now! Go read it and tell me what you think!
A little excerpt…
Catalina staggered out of the upstairs bathroom and down the corridor to Zaira’s old room. She could make out the outline of a man coming up the stairs, but she couldn’t see his face due to the direct sunlight, and maybe to the panic attack she was currently having.
Hey, lovelies! I’m back on Substack!
The tiny screenshotted fragment there is from the latest chapter of a story I post monthly, apart from my essays or short stories which I try to post weekly on fridays, but it’d been a while since I last posted.
Here’s the link to my latest piece, read the previous chapters before it (or don’t) and tell me what you think! I love hearing from you!!
I missed you all,
Anna
Hey angels. How was your weekend? I hope It was amazing. I didn't do much apart from homework and uni stuff. Anyway, I wrote on my substack; I did a weekly r.e.p.o.r.t, that's where you say the things you're into that week, I put some pictures of the fashion I was into, I think it turned out great. Here's the link if you guys wanna check it out.
https://annagutierrez.substack.com/p/weekly-report
Gratefully,
Anna.
Hola chicas! Sé que esto es un poco diferente a lo que suelo publicar, pero acabo de subir un ensayo en Substack y me gustaría que lo leyeran. El ensayo es un trabajo que hice para clase de historia de la filosofía el año pasado, es sobre la relación entre el marxismo y el feminismo y habla de que pese a sus similitudes las dos doctrinas nunca se han unido, y de el porqué de todo eso. aquí está el link:
Espero que os guste, como siempre,
Xx,
Anna.
![What you describe here - the efforts of volunteers, your own commitment to rebuilding your life despite the occupation’s effort to tear it down, even refusing to leave when they try to kick you out - all sounds like resistance to me. What is your perspective on resistance to genocide, in all its forms? To you, what does it mean to resist?
We are not just resisting the resistance that the world knows...
We resist while getting a living. We resist [in] queues for bread, water, oven, and cell phone charging.
We are struggling with the tent that melted from the heat of the sun and was torn apart.
We resist memories that shatter us a thousand times a minute.
We resist insects, rodents, flies, mosquitoes and sand.
We are resisting a resistance that cannot be counted or counted.
But nonetheless..
Gaza will not be left, if it leaves us, Gaza is inside us, growing inside our hearts, inside our soul. Gaza is not a city! Gaza is the mother of the whole country, the last of the walls. I will not get out of it even if my soul does.](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ba1235edcdc4b75d102087f59e06f3f1/75b862644a29fca6-91/s500x750/88ab04006200c85f4c03c9688d0cd1888b752325.png)
link to the article
siraj's tumblr blog
siraj's gofundme
My Favorite Comics of 2024
The last of my little 2024 lists. Am I ever doing this much again for a yearly wrap-up? Probably not. But I am glad I finished it.
This one is about comics. You can read it here!
My friend Maddie and I made a cute little winter writing challenge to flex our writing skills and create more. Feel free to check it out and maybe do a prompt! It's in my substack for anyone to use!
