BG3 Companions And Their Knights Radiant Orders, According To Me

I can't handle Astarion in his little robe.

He looks so cozy.

BG3 roleplay nonsense

I love doing silly little inconsequential things in this game to give me serotonin, including:

Collecting all the rocks and minerals I find and keeping them in a pouch. 

Giving all the random teddy bears we find to Karlach to hold in her inventory

Giving Astarion a piece of malachite for his inventory because the flavor text says there’s superstition about it helping bad dreams

Giving Astarion one of the blood bank bottles to keep in his inventory so he always has a snack on hand

Giving Shadowheart ALL the night orchids

Giving Shadowheart the little statue of Selune in act 3

Letting Lae’zel carry the Githyanki egg the whole time 

Making act 1 Karlach pet Scratch and the owlbear cub because she can touch them without them bursting into flames, and she needs the comfort

Picking up the bodies of any innocent people who die and laying them somewhere nice for a little funeral

Throwing the Gortash propaganda posters on the ground

Having Astarion bite my character at the beginning of the day so he’s happy (it's worth the spell slot to fix bloodless idc)

Leaving the personal effects on corpses (letters from loved ones, keepsake items, etc.)

Talking to every animal in the game

Dying everyone’s armor to match their color scheme (that i made up)

Talking to everyone in camp/ petting the critters every. Single. Long rest. 

Making sure everyone has at least some time in the party, not just my faves… 

Letting Astarion pickpocket often, for morale

My character is constantly getting encumbered but I refuse to make the squishy characters carry more than thirty pounds. (Especially Astarion. Wouldn't want him to break a nail.)

Little Astarion the bat! (*˘︶˘*).｡*♡

Again with poor Wyll:

I was randomly reminded of this scene the other day and how you have the option of talking Wyll down from wanting to kill Mizora. It's framed as a good thing, like you're steering him away from a dark path of digging two graves, but is that really what this is? I think he has every right to want to kill her (monster hunter that he is), not just for himself, but to protect anyone else she'd take advantage of and hurt in the future. I understand that what this line is saying is us telling him that he might do more good in taking on enemies as needed rather than putting all this time into a single target, but if that's the case I don't like how it's phrased.

I get that Wyll is the most morally righteous of the companions, and being driven by revenge isn't exactly a good thing, but he has every right to want it. She forced him into a slavery contract, directly violated his bodily integrity at least twice, supported the death of the most important person in his life, and has been mentally tormenting him all the while.

Wyll is absolutely the type to fight out of love and the desire to protect rather than to hurt and avenge, yes. But I still think it's really condescending to tell him "revenge is bad", when (to my memory), we never tell Astarion that wanting revenge on Cazador is wrong. And Shadowheart taking out the Sharrans is seen as a grim and unfortunate but necessary public service. Even with Karlach, I think the most we say about her wanting end Gortash is "let's wait and be smart about this" (if you're planning to kill him at all, that is). Either this is another example of Wyll not getting the same treatment as other characters (and dare I say, being reductive of his trauma), or I'm just projecting. Maybe I'm misreading this whole thing — let me know.

But telling him to "let it go" is kind of wild no matter how you look at it.

(to be clear I don't think murder and revenge are "good" things. But killing devils seems to be framed as like killing a monster rather than a person, and even then, killing people is commonplace in this game. I'm just saying the morality should be consistent.)

Post-game rambles

So I finally finished my first playthrough of BG3. Here are some of my brief, post-game-emotion-addled thoughts on it. (Alternate title: The existence of Astarion has forever altered my brain chemistry I will never be able to adequately express my feelings about him)

I had spent a year dying to get this game before I ever played it, because I had heard such good things, and honestly it surpassed my expectations in every way. I can tell this is one of those pieces of art that will remain firmly implanted in my heart probably forever. I could go on for days about everything I love about this game, but I think there are also some things I could never put into words if I tried.

In particular, Astarion and his storyline really just completely and profoundly captivated me in a way I don't know how to express. It's very rare that a character consumes my heart and mind this much, but his story and character is beyond beautiful and will always be incredibly special to me. Not to say I don't absolutely adore the other characters, because I do, but Astarion just stole both the show and my heart. I will never shut up about him. All the characters in this story feel so alive, and it's palpable just how much heart went into creating them, along with everything else in the world of this game.

It's been a while since a story's had me bawling my eyes out multiple times like this game had me, and it was so well-earned. I cared so much about this world and characters that everything just affected me so deeply. All the feelings are still raw and I'm a mess, so someday I think I'll be better able to put into words what this game meant to me, but right now I'm just dizzy with how amazing this experience was. I think I'll be losing my mind about it forever.

And I'm looking forward to playing it about 100,000 more times.

Daily reminder to myself that:

I don't need to write for anyone but myself.

My personal writing has no deadlines. I'm not falling behind anyone, because I'm not in competition.

There is nothing to prove.

Originality is not the end-all be-all. If someone else has explored the same idea as you before, that doesn't make my version any less valuable or meaningful.

I can write what I want.

There is no reason to hold back anything on the page. No reason for shame or hiding or preemptive self-judgement. I have no audience unless I choose to let them in.

The "quality" of my work does not determine my value as an artist or a person.

I don't need to write like anyone else

Not everyone will understand and that's okay.

IT DOESN"T NEED TO BE PERFECT

Or even "complete"

In fact, let go of the idea of perfection entirely.

Writing should be for joy, growth, and expression.

What does it say about me that I feel like having a brain that works the way Harry Du Bois' does would be cool and efficient?

He's getting the chance to explore his hobbies and passions 🥺

He's such a silly goose 💚

[From the game's datamined dialogues, described as "voice barks for Astarion as the player interacts with the screen"]

Oh sorry, I forgot

5. Insufferable bastard

I’ve been trying to get some good dialogue scene screenshots of Astarion, and my field research suggests that he has these modes only: 

Literal model

"Depraved carnal lust"

Sad cat

Actual gremlin