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Closeted - Blog Posts
If anyone has any tips for writing an ai3 fanfic about a group of closeted gays trying to come out to the world while proving that being gay isn’t bad while they are suffering from depression and other mental illnesses and being bullied I would love them please
This is a collaboration with @sopapilla11 check out her ao3 it’s the same user
REVISITED LESBIAN MASTERDOC
I wanna share with y'all my version of the lesbian masterdoc. we know the og is a bit problematic, but it helped me sm, so I revisited it. if you don't have a lot of points you aren't necessarily a lesbian. notice that a lot of points also have cons (maybe you're bi and you prefer women, you have orientation OCD, you're aroace, that's your taste in men, you are emotionally unavailable, etc). so here we go...
you believe women are objectively pretty and men are objectively ugly
you believe love is just friendship with kisses
you see having sex with men as a burden
if you're a virgin, you wanna have your first time with a man in a long time
using religion as an excuse (subconsciously) to have sex after marriage
in your sexual fantasies the man is not very detailed/the more there are details the more you're bored or disinterested/you're the observer of the scene and you focus on the woman
you constantly doubt you're into men, but you don't do that with women
you find interesting men that you can't have (taken/married men, gay men, aroace men, fictional men, celebrities, much older men, men who clearly don't give a shit about you)
you prefer having long-distance relationships with men
in series and movies you focus on female characters and don't care about the male ones
having sex with men as a form of self-harm subconsciously
you prefer feminine men
when you think you have a crush on a guy, your fantasies are never actually romantic (ex. you imagine yourselves simply hanging out and enjoying each other's company, with no kisses or stuff like that)
you think you're not attracted to men cuz you still have to find the one
you have very high standards with men, but not with women
you run away as soon as the boy likes you back
finding absurd other girls lose their minds over men
not getting what's so special about certain men (ex. Leonardo DiCaprio)
you have never noticed him, but when other girls start to like him you start to crush on him, too
crushing on the guy that is liked by the girl you're super close with
believing that being attracted to men means simply finding them "nice"
choosing a boy as a crush just because someone asked you if you liked somebody or they pressured you
wishing you were a lesbian
believing you can't be a lesbian because you would've already known
believing you gotta have sex with your man just to show him you care for him, not because you enjoy it
basing your attraction for men on their personality only
finding boring future with a man
being scared of being a lesbian and asking yourself if you're one at the same time
having an intense friendship with a woman, especially if she's sapphic
always imagining yourself with a man in the future, knowing you'd rather be with a woman
thinking you'd be 100% with a woman in a world with no homophobia
changing a lot of labels, but never considering the lesbian one. you'd rather go directly for aroace
believing you're into men, but you don't care about making male friends or you have never found them interesting, not even in a platonic way
when a straight fantasy isn't making you horny, you change the story many and many times to try to turn you on on purpose to prove your heterosexuality/bisexuality
you go out with any man that likes you
you want men to want you, but when it works it makes you feel uncomfortable
getting into a straight relationship just for material convenience or to feel cool or not to let the world think you could be sapphic
wishing your boyfriend wasn't that into romantic stuff and sex
you get over men very fast
wishing for a relationship, not really for a boyfriend
wanting sex with men for validation
you need to be drunk or high to have hetero sex
wanting straight sex only if you're subdued
wanting to kiss a girl friend "to know how to kiss boys"
touching a girl by mistake and feeling weird after it (it could be simply an arm touch)
feeling awkward in a changing room
"if she were a boy, I'd be with her"/"if I were a boy, I'd be with her"
"if I were him, I'd never treat her like that"
being obsessed with queer culture as an "ally"
"everyone is a little bit gay"
everyone thinks you are
wanting to kiss a female friend as a sign of "big friendship"
some girls kiss each other to turn men on, so you take subconsciously this opportunity to kiss one because you actually desire to
kissing girls when you're drunk/high
you constantly find ways not to believe you're a lesbian
you find more sensible gay men's attraction than straight girl's attraction to men
not having "enough time for men and relationships"
if your friend uses other pronouns too, you use them a lot, more than the feminine ones to subconsciously bypass your attraction
treating bad out of nowhere the girl you were so attached to
every time you find a man funny you automatically think you're into him
you try to like men to feel more feminine (for trans girls)
joking many times about not being attracted to men or their genitals
btw if you're sure you don't like men in a sexual way, but you still don't know if you like them emotionally I recommend to research on limerence. that's how I realised I was a lesbian<3
I hope all of this helps you girlies. you're always valid♡
So if you're hiding your gayness it's called "in the closet". Are closeted pansexuals "in the pantry"?, are closeted asexuals "in the deck"?
Anyway, I think closeted non binaries should be referred to as "in the bee hive" cause I just thought of it today.
For years, the TV in my parents’ house had a greyscale Fox News logo burned into the bottom-left corner of the screen due to how often that channel was on.
I used to think it was funny back before I started questioning myself. Now I’m just glad I don’t have to look at it anymore.
This isn’t really meant to be a comic trashing my dad.
I do truly appreciate his commitment to education. I do truly have a soft spot for his style of humor, which certainly influenced the development of my own. I appreciate how he had this VHS-C camera that he was always bringing out and would let me use, sparking my love for movies and starting me on a path that led to me going to film school.
All those good things about him were real.
But so was the colossal amount of damage he caused.
If you happen to be a parent and are reading this right now, I’m going to ask that you consider this suggestion from a childless thirty-six year old:
You need to consider how you communicate with your child, and how communication doesn’t just mean the words that you use.
You’re telling your kids something with the foods you eat, the activities you engage in, etc…
…you communicate to your children with the media you consume.
The rhetoric against the trans community wasn’t as much in the spotlight when I was growing up, but every time my dad turned on the radio, he’d have my sister and I listen to the likes of Rush Limbaugh, or Sean Hannity, Mark Levin, etc… One of the topics that’d come up frequently was queer people.
Issues about Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, gay marriage, gay boy scouts…
The “gays” were an issue. More than an issue really, they were a problem. If someone was queer, these radio hosts were quick to villainize; “this teacher is going to turn their students gay,” “this troop leader is going to abuse his scouts,” you don’t want your kid to end up like that, do you?”
My dad would listen to these folks non-stop and nod along in agreement, all the while his extremely queer and aware of it child was sitting right behind him, listening to how she was some kind of monster.
So I hid.
There could be no sharing about aspects of myself. My parents would be listening to 770am or Fox News all the time. If I share that I was queer, I’d be finished. How couldn’t that be the case? Every day they chose to listen to people that hate me, so they hate people like me.
So I can’t let them know me. I won’t let them know me.
Even though they never said that they hated queer people with their own words, they told me that they hated queer people every day with the media they chose, and in turn forced me to consume.
So again, if there are any parents reading this right now, consider my words. Hate is a choice you make, and hate can be communicated with more than just words.
If for no other reason, you never know if that kid in the back seat is listening, listening to how you hate them.
the kit conner situation is so rude and unpleasant. literally where the hell is respect for closeted people,, the community is actually disgusting for making him out himself.
me and my straight best friend made out while we were both pissed and i can’t stop thinking about it
i have to dress and act super straight all weekend to impress my sisters boyfriends family. feeling drained already :/